While both Roc and Auden were born at home, the birth experiences were quite different. Roc's birth lasted around 8.5 hours and Auden's was much shorter, 4.5 hours. With Roc, I woke up with contractions at 7 a.m. after a full night's rest and with Auden, I woke up at 3 a.m. after two hours of interrupted (think toddler screaming at the top of his lungs) sleep. With Roc, I pushed for about 30 minutes and with Auden, it took an hour and a half. Roc's birth was much more mental for me whereas Auden's was much more physical. The comparisons could go on and on...
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There were some hints that I might go in to labor the day before Auden's birth so we prepared by notifying our midwife and my in-laws. My mother-in-law came to spend the night with us, just in case, and my midwife and I were in contact until around midnight. She was on call for another birth and we were hoping Auden would wait until the morning so that she could be with us (rather than sending another midwife in her place).
When I woke up just before 3 a.m. to use the bathroom, I noticed a strong contraction but since I was still half-asleep, I didn't know if it was a Braxton-Hicks or a real contraction. I just ignored it and laid down to go back to sleep. While I was in the process of falling asleep, I had another contraction and decided it was worth waiting up to see if anything was happening.
At first the contractions were 10+ minutes apart and lasting around 90 seconds. It was clear that this was the beginning but it was not clear how long it would take for them to become regular and three to four minutes apart. Around 3:30 a.m., after about three contractions, I decided that Kilian should wake up and just before 4 a.m., the contractions were coming regularly every five minutes and lasting two to three minutes, with some eventually getting close to four minutes long - basically double contractions.
We called the midwife and woke up Kilian's mom. My midwife was unfortunately at another home and had to send someone else. This someone arrived about an hour later, just before 5 a.m. During this time, phone calls were made and members of the family were notified. I lost some fluids and thought it was my water breaking; I found out later that it was not. I was walking around and focusing on breathing through these intense contractions. It felt more difficult than it did with Roc. I think this is because I was still congested from a cold I had had the week before so there was lots of mucus that made deep, slow breathing hard and also because I was out of practice. I hadn't been doing yoga or meditation or any birth prep in the weeks leading up to the birth and I think my body was out of practice.
When this lady, the other midwife, arrived around 5 a.m. she found me to be exceedingly and unexpectedly calm, still completely clothed, sitting upright and laboring on the edge of the bed. I was just waiting it out. Since it took around eight hours to get to the pushing stage with Roc's birth, I figured it would be a while with Auden too. I wasn't in a hurry and couldn't gauge how long it would be with Auden. It still felt like the labor had just begun so of course I was chilled out.
But after she arrived, I noticed a change in the labor. It got more mental and physical. With Roc's birth, I was pretty much in my head the whole time - focusing on positive thoughts, trying to trust my self, my body and the whole process, trying to mitigate any fears I might have had, etc. With Auden's labor, I didn't have any apprehensions going in and I was so looking forward to going through the natural birth experience again and meeting him at the end that I was too excited to even harbor any negative thoughts or fears. However, when I started reaching transition - that critical point between the first and second stages of labor - I really noticed the mental challenges it creates. I used the full length bedroom mirror to look myself in the eyes, to reconnect to what I was doing and to smile. It felt so powerful, beautiful and exhilarating. That part was truly awesome.
About an hour after her arrival, around 6 a.m., I felt intense urges to push while at the same time feeling like I wasn't quite there yet (in terms of dilation). Thankfully at that moment, my midwife arrived and was able to coach and guide me through the next part. (Her other birth was advancing at a much slower pace than mine so she was able to make it for the most important part of mine.)
It was not obvious at first, but Auden's head was slightly tilted in such a way that he was stuck behind the pelvic bone and regardless of how much I pushed, he wouldn't move until he got around the bone. My midwife guided through me countless positions until we finally found one that worked. It took over an hour and I became very tired - some of the positions required much more force than just pushing. Some of these positions required a lot of physical effort from Kilian and his muscles were sore the following days. During this stage, it was amazing how lucid I was. There were moments in between contractions that I didn't feel like I was in labor. I would be standing upright, completely relaxed and not feeling any discomfort, even ready to talk and joke around.
After the sun rose, I finally felt Auden move into the birth canal. It was such a relief and I was so full of joy and renewed with energy. I wanted to push him all the way out at that moment but we waited. I got into a comfortable position on the bed and we allowed him to descend slowly. After a few minutes, my midwife gave me the go ahead and with a deep breath, I pushed him out in to my hands. It was 7:29 a.m.
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| A few hours old |
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| A few hours old |
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