Mistaken Beliefs and Taking Responsibility

Lately, I have been thinking a lot about the concept of taking responsibility for one's life and all that it entails. Shoghi Effendi reminds us that:

Each of us is responsible for one life only, and that is our own. Each of us is immeasurably far from being "perfect as our heavenly father is perfect" and the task of perfecting our own life and character is one that requires all our attention, our will-power and energy.

In general, as a concept in society, it seems that people don't realize their own potential or their own power over who they are. It is as if they are just subject to the various forces around them. For example, if someone is mean to them, the assumed appropriate response is to be mean back. This assumption or belief in "an eye for an eye" does at least two things: 1, is that it makes the individual's behavior dependent on the actions of others, rendering them weak and powerless to external forces beyond their control (e.g. someone else's behavior) and 2, it nurtures a sense of entitlement and justification for retaliating.  The person perpetrating the wrong-doing is the one wronged, not the person who receives the bad action and it baffles me that often we see the wronged one commit another wrong in return, the victim of both an external force and the hurt ego.

Another example we often see is within the young people around us who behave in ways that are aligned with what their family, friends, community, teachers say to them or believe about them. Often times, the adults in their life have very low and negative standards for these young people, expecting the worst from them. We then see the youth act out in negative ways which goes on to perpetuate the negative beliefs around them. There seems to be little hope for escaping the cycle and ever more frequently, there are articles about this problematic age group in the media as well as stories of ever more appalling behavior from them.

Both of these examples just scratch the surface on this issue which is based on one or more mistaken beliefs that create negative results in the lives of those who believe in them. In both examples, these beliefs seem to be the result of poor education - people just don't know better and most likely, their parents taught it to them because most likely, they didn't know any better either.

Living life in this way is not living an authentic life and it is not taking responsibility for who you are and who you want to be. The Bahá’í Writings explain:

We must not be content with simply following a certain course because we find our fathers pursued that course. It is the duty of everyone to investigate reality, and investigation of reality by another will not do for us... Ideas and beliefs left by his fathers and ancestors as a heritage will not suffice, for adherence to these are but imitations and imitations have ever been a cause of disappointment and misguidance. Be investigators of reality, that you may attain the verity of truth and life. - 'Abdu'l-Bahá

The beliefs of our forefathers or of those around us do not necessarily reflect the truth about reality or the nature of life. When we continue down a path of believing in ideas such as "an eye for an eye" or "teenagers are rebellious and unruly" we are propagating negative beliefs in our society and culture that are based on fiction. We are doing ourselves, our peers and our children a disservice. To me, this is one manifestation of not taking responsibility.  We can look at some other writings from the Bahá’í Faith to gain insights into what it then means to take responsibility for oneself:

Each human creature has individual endowment, power and responsibility in the creative plan of God. - 'Abdu'l-Bahá

Unto each one hath been prescribed a pre-ordained measure...All that which ye potentially possess can, however, be manifested only as a result of your own volition. Your own acts testify to this truth. - Bahá'u'lláh

Man is the supreme Talisman. Lack of a proper education hath, however, deprived him of that which he doth inherently possess... Regard man as a mine rich in gems of inestimable value. Education can, alone, cause it to reveal its treasures, and enable mankind to benefit therefrom.  - Bahá'u'lláh

The reality of man is his thought, not his material body... the power of thought is dependent on its manifestation in deeds. - 'Abdu'l-Bahá

I charge you all that each one of you concentrate all the thoughts of your heart on love and unity. When a thought of war comes, oppose it by a stronger thought of peace. A thought of hatred must be destroyed by a more powerful thought of love. Thoughts of war bring destruction to all harmony, well-being, restfulness and content. - 'Abdu'l-Bahá

This last writing is of particular importance to this discussion. 'Abdu'l-Bahá says, "Thoughts of war bring destruction to all harmony, well-being, restfulness and content." This concept is not limited to the literal concept of war, but rather any negative thought one might have. Since we know that we can control and change our thoughts and beliefs, we can see an enormous power that rests within each one of us. I may not have the power to change someone else's beliefs, but by changing my own, I can make an impact on the world. And if I change my thoughts, even better since often our thoughts are informed by our beliefs. And if I change both my beliefs and thoughts, which then inform my actions, I'm not only improving my own life, but I am creating positive change all around - in my family, friendships, community, work and society. It's the responsibility of each and everyone of us to take charge of our destinies, of who we are and who we want to be. Rumi says:

Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.